Things could be worse.

Thursday, June 29, 2000

Things could be worse.

Can you imagine how Intercourse, Pa., advertises itself?

Austin is, of course, home of the Pigs in the City promotion.

I squeal, therefore, I am.

Beginning this weekend, thousands of visitors will come to Austin for SPAM Jam, the SPAMTOWN USA Festival and the Pigs in the City promotion.

They will also visit to celebrate family reunions and Independence Day.

There’s a lot to see in Austin.

Even if I didn’t belong to the organization, I would say Spruce Up Austin Inc. has contributed much to the city.

There’s nothing like the feeling one gets driving by trees and saying to yourself, "I helped plant those."

Of course, the most conspicuous area is the Hormel Century Parkway, where the 100 trees for Hormel Foods Corp. project has become more than 500 trees for all time.

Austin High School always looks great, especially in the morning when the sun rises and throws a spotlight on the red brick exterior.

A city can be proud of its schools always.

Personally, I like the downtown area. Anchored by the Mower County Government Center and its carefully manicured west lawn, there’s something to be said for the whole area, especially the Mower County Veterans Memorial.

North Main Street’s shops look inviting to visit.

In fact, if I was a first-time visitor to Austin, the first impressions I would make of the city would be based on the East Side Lake area, the downtown business district, Austin High School, Horace Austin Park and Hormel Foods Corp.’s facilities.

Having seen those areas, I would have good feelings about the city.

I just don’t know what I would think about the city when I saw 45 gaily-decorated concrete pigs staring back at me.

Personally, I’m still having trouble adjusting to the Pigs in the City promotion.

To help, I opened Sara Rath’s new book "The Complete Pig," published by Voyageur Press.

The Elm Grove, Wis., woman also has written two books about cows, as well as four other books about life in the countryside.

The book helped to dispel some misgivings I’ve had about pigs.

For instance, there are many porcine patois that could substitute for other words in reporting the news of the day.

"The Mower County Board of Commissioners is on the pig’s back (prosperous) after a report said the county’s reserves have risen to $40 million.

"The news didn’t affect reporter Lee Bonorden at the meeting. Bonorden continued to call pigs (snore) through the entire meeting.

"The commissioners’ reaction to the news left them feeling happy as a pig in mud (content).

"County Coordinator Craig Oscarson observed, ‘That’s the way the hog bladder bounces,’ (c’est la vie – or that’s the way things go)."

The book opened my eyes to appreciate swine. As Austin Mayor Bonnie Rietz is fond of saying, "If that don’t beat a pig a-pecking," which translates into "That’s amazing!"

So, maybe there’s hope for me, and I will indeed come to admire those gaily-decorated concrete pigs.

First, I want to enjoy Austin and celebrate Independence Day.

As George Washington and a few others would say, to do anything else on July 4 is hogwash, which doesn’t need translation.

Stay tuned.

Where there’s swill, there’s a way.