Sometimes, I feel out of it.

Out of the loop, outside the box, off the page, waaaaaay out.

And I'm not referring to Sunday morning sermons at church. That's a whole different story.

It's just that occasions occur, when I feel no link to the reality of the moment.

In this case, I am not referring to political candidate forums.

This disassociation with reality happens frequently at meetings.

Not just the news staff meetings, but others as well.

I can't help it. My mind wanders. Thoughts come and go.

The other day I wondered to myself if half the stuff teachers say in the classroom is made up.

If it is, the lucky ones are those who weren't paying attention in class.

Another time, during a lull in the meeting action, I wondered, what ever happened to dwarf tossing? Is it a sport or isn't it? Could it be a violation of dwarf rights by not allowing them to be tossed if they want to be tossed?

When somebody told me about that sign urging people to vote for Todd Clennon for Mower County Sheriff in the field along Highway 16 west of Austin, but inside the Freeborn County line, I was dumbfounded.

Grace Schwab has had more yard signs stolen than any other candidate. If a campaign advisor told Mr. Clennon the way to avoid that is to put up signs in the next county, that's bad advice.

I covered an Austin City Council meeting the other night and sat in the back row near an exit door just in case.

If it weren't for that darned camera that captures our city officials in action or whatever they call it making so much noise, I might have gotten a good nap.

My mind started wandering and I pondered if the mayor and council members sitting two or three feet higher than everyone else and behind a large table, were wearing any shoes.

This brush with unreality also frequently occurs, when I get e-mail.

The other day I got an e-mail announcing "Russian women are looking for western men."

And this was not just some anonymous come-on. I know because the message read, "They're eager to meet regular guys of all ages."

I'm regular.

Also, the message advised, "You're exactly what they're looking for."

"How could they know that?" I wondered.

Another e-mail message got me to worrying about Sierra Leone in west Africa.

It was addressed "Dear Sir or Madam" so I was suspicious from the start.

It turns out the former advisor on arms control and acquisition to the president of the tiny nation was sent to the Netherlands to purchase weapons, during a civil war. While there, he decided to defect to the rebels and not return to Sierra Leone.

He claims he was sent to the Netherlands with $36 million from his country's treasury.

Now, he would like to transfer it to a checking account in America, where it can earn interest.

I immediately wondered if the Mower County Board of Commissioners ever get those kind of proposals and that's the reason our fund balances are so high.

Lee Bonorden can be contacted at 434-2232 or by e-mail at :mailto:lee.bonorden@austindailyherald.com