Parents should familiarize themselves with the different forms of bullying that a child with disabilities may experience:

• Manipulative bullying: This form of bullying occurs when a child with disabilities is actually being coerced and controlled by another student.

• Conditional friendship: This form of bullying occurs when a child thinks that someone is being their friend, but the times of “friendship” are alternated with times of bullying.

• Exploitative bullying: This form of bullying occurs when the features of the child’s condition are used to bully them either by other classmates or via technology and social media networks.

The following are best practices for parents with kids with disabilities:

• Be aware that students often feel that adult intervention is infrequent and unhelpful and, as such, fear that telling adults will only bring more harassment from bullies.

• Be observant of a child’s behavior, appearance and moods, particularly if one thinks that a child is ‘at risk’ for being bullied. If a child is reluctant to attend school, investigate why and consider a negative social experience as one reason.

• If a parent suspects something is wrong, talk with the child. Children can be reluctant to speak up for fear of retaliation or because they don’t want to “tattletale.” Whether it’s a parent or the child who initiates the conversation, speak openly and honestly — and listen. Keep the conversation at a level a child can understand. Remember that every child is different, what may not bother one child, might be extremely detrimental to another.

• Don’t blame the child. Be supportive, loving and patient. Take his/her story seriously. Let him/her know that it’s not his/her fault and that appropriate action will be taken.

• Get details from the child about the incident(s). Try not to direct his/her responses, but ask pertinent questions about what happened and how he/she felt/feels. Let the child know that appropriate confidentiality will be kept, but that keeping bullying a secret is not good for anyone. Tell the child that he/she has the right to be safe.

• Stay focused on the child and the issue. Though a parent will likely be upset and/or angry for the child, over reacting (or under reacting) can make things more stressful for a child. Allowing emotions to ‘take over’ can also make an objective assessment of the situation more difficult. Keeping an emotional response in check will help one better support and advocate for the child.

• If appropriate, problem solve or brainstorm intervention strategies with the child. Giving him/her relevant information, such as the definition of bullying, at a level he/she can understand, can be helpful as well.

Upcoming Events and Activities

Download our current newsletter at www.arcmowercounty.org for a complete list of activities and events.

June 4-5: Weekend Ventures to Lacrosse, Wis.

June 10: All-You-Can-Eat Summer Salad Luncheon, from 11 a.m. to 1 p.m. Cost is $7 per person. Tickets available in advance or at the door.