QUESTION: What are the different reasons to give an adolescent for waiting to become sexually active?

ANSWER: There are many. Share these with your young teenager and ask which ones make the most sense from his/her perspective:

Makes relationships less confusing • Get to be close with fewer risks • Less stress • No birth control side effects • Gives you time to build a strong friendship • No worry about getting someone pregnant or becoming pregnant • No guilt if you have religious beliefs about sex • Won’t have to buy condoms • Won’t be a mom or dad before you’re ready • Easier to tell future partner about your past • A chance to learn about commitment • Less obligation in the relationship • More time for friends • Easier to be honest with each other • Don’t have to worry about whether you’ll measure up • Can focus on future goals • Won’t get HIV from sex • Easier to be independent • Easier to pay attention to partner’s feelings • Easier to concentrate on a career • Don’t have to get STD check ups • Get respect for doing what’s right for you • Good role model for friends • No hurt feelings from one night stands • Can make sure you love the person • Gives you time to learn more about your body • Fewer things to disagree about with your partner • Good role model for your younger brothers and sisters • Your parents will be happier • Chance to learn the difference between love and sex • When you do have sex, you’ll know it was a careful choice • Better control over your life • Sex can complicate a good relationship • No fear of getting caught in the act • Don’t have to wear your best underwear • More time for sports • Can learn to trust each other • Can practice thinking of creative ways to have fun together • No guilt about sneaking around • No worries about condoms breaking • You won’t get chlamydia • Satisfaction that you are meeting a difficult challenge • Easier to focus on school • Feel proud of doing what seems right to you • Don’t have to explain to parents • Peace of mind • More time for family • Will know the person likes you, not just your body • Can have more hobbies and interests • You won’t get gonorrhea • You won’t need to remember to use birth control • You won’t have to be nervous about having sex • Can be romantic without it leading to sex • Clear limits will help you just relax and enjoy each other.

If you would like to talk about raising children, call the toll-free Parent WarmLine at 1-888-584-2204/Línea de Apoyo at 877-434-0528.

For free emergency child care call Crisis Nursery at 1-877-434-9599. Check out www.familiesandcommunities.org.