Echoes from the Loafers’ Club Meeting:

“I’m worried.”

“What are you worried about?”

“My wife left a message telling me not to get the items she told me to pick up and I can’t remember what items I shouldn’t get.”

 

Driving by the Bruces

I have two wonderful neighbors — both named Bruce — who live across the road from each other. Whenever I pass their driveways, thoughts occur to me, such as: the best parts of storms are the stories.

 

I’ve learned

1. Calendars are half-off now. Mayan calendars are way off.

2. When you make a mental note, make two copies.

3. Help wanted signs in fast food restaurants indicate a strong economy.

 

Mr. Fix-It

A friend made 32 wallets out of duct tape. I think he plans to win the lottery. I’ve never been good at making anything other than a mess.

I thought about that as I put on work gloves. Doing maintenance or repairs outside in January makes things interesting. The cold slows a job so much that it makes me rush.

I paused to think about the glove compartment of my car. I keep many things in there, but it never holds gloves.

My father and my brother Donald excelled in fixing things. I know they’d learned those skills, but their abilities seemed inborn. My job, when helping them, was to hold the light.

I put on the gloves and boldly went where I had gone before.

 

Those thrilling days of yesteryear

It was a time of the year when we prepared for the future. Produce was stored for winter. I heard, “One potater, two for later.” I had a difficult time gathering eggs. The hen fruit kept moving out of my reach. It was a case of restless egg syndrome.

During the time when I hung out with Wally, Eddie, and Lumpy, the hottest spice found in our home was catsup. A minister I met when I spoke in Texas was fond of his homemade hot sauce. He loved the stuff so much that he carried a bottle with him. He offered me a spoonful. I took it. When I was once again able to form words, I managed to gasp, “I’ve heard ministers preach hellfire, but you’re the first one I’ve met who passed out samples!”

 

Did you know?

“Chugwagon” was once a popular US slang for an automobile.

According to a survey by Georgia-Pacific, 31 percent of people make their toilet paper into a “snowball” and 28 percent fold it into squares.

 

Customer comments

Kathy Paulson of Geneva sent this, “Life is short. Smile while you still have teeth.”

 

Nature notes

Paul Schwab of Owatonna writes about a hawk looking for a meal and becoming a meal, “A hawk flew by our feeders, scattering birds. Unfortunately, one hit the window. I thought I’d go out and put it in the recovery bag. The hawk came back, picked it up, and flew away. I think it was a goldfinch and a sharp-shinned hawk. The next morning, I looked out and a Cooper’s hawk (juvenile, the eyes were yellow) had captured a sizable victim. Got the binoculars and it had taken a sharp-shinned hawk. It could not fly away with it. It plucked away feathers and began feeding on it. In three more attempts to fly, it only covered thirty feet. Finally, the Cooper’s hawk did get the sharp-shinned hawk airborne. Do they come back and eat more of a large prey or not? Or do they just leave when full and kill again when hungry?” The answer is “yes” to both questions. It depends upon the hawk, its needs, and whether it feels secure in that location. These two hawks are difficult to tell apart. A sharp-shinned hawk has sharp corners on the tip of its tail. The tip of the Cooper’s hawk’s tail is more rounded like the letters in Cooper’s. The Cooper’s is built like a football player, with a thick, tubular body with a low center of gravity. The sharpie has a broad chest and narrow hips like a cross country runner. The sharpie’s eyes appear about halfway between the front and back of head. A Coop’s eyes appear to be closer to the front of the head. To me this makes the sharp-shinned look cute, the Coop fierce.

 

Meeting adjourned

W. Jaynee Carolus of Lewiston, PA sent this, “Kindness is just the tip of the niceberg.”