Echoes From the Loafers’ Club Meeting

That car I bought is a lemon.

Take it back to the dealer.

I can’t.

Why not?

The guy who sold it to me said that I’d never have any trouble with it and I don’t want to make him a liar.

Driving by the Bruces

I have two wonderful neighbors —both named Bruce — who live across the road from each other. Whenever I pass their driveways, thoughts occur to me, such as: Where do you put things in order to forget where they are? We’re all great singers when no one is listening. Don’t look so hard for bad news that countless blessings go unnoticed.

From the pulpit to the pew

There was no one in the front pews.

The church was well attended, but the forward seats remained unoccupied.

This is a common occurrence. I’ve wondered why. Is it a sinners’ row where sermon subjects are afraid to sit?

I had no answer until I began giving a number of sermons from the pulpit. The reason no one wants to sit in the front pews is because it’s too windy there.

I attend many wakes and funerals. I feel as if I’ve run out of things to say. The best thing to say might be nothing. A handshake or a hug may be the best thing.

A hound for hoping

I’m a hound for hoping. Poptown was my big chance to get pop as a boy. I hoped for a Tom Moore orange or strawberry pop. It was called pop, never soft drinks or sodas. Poptown was a nickname for the tiny village of Bath that was located not far from our farm. It had a bustling population of several people. Why was it called Poptown? Because pop was available there.

Each year, I hope that winter would be gentle.

An unofficial poll showed that 98 percent of the locals are sick of winter. A favorite whine is, “I think we should see other seasons.” At this time of the year and at all other times of the year, I appreciate those willing to share their sunshine with others.

I hoped to be plenty early. My parents believed that if you weren’t 30 minutes early to an appointment, you were late. A friend, Larry Nelson of Hartland, said that his wife complains a bit when he is 30 minutes early. She considers that to be five minutes late.

I drove through a parking ramp at the Mayo Clinic in Rochester. Parking places were scarcer than hen’s teeth. A barn-sized SUV ahead of me spent forever trying to cram her vehicle into a “compact car only” parking space. How she got it in there and how she got out of the vehicle were amazing things. When I saw her walking to the elevators, I knew why she thought she could park there. She was maybe 5-foot tall and tipped the scales at about 90 pounds. She was compact.

I feel as I did at 17, only tired. I’ve enrolled in an eight-year study at Mayo Clinic. I asked them if it was guaranteed and if my money would be cheerfully refunded if I weren’t around for the entire eight-year study.

I’m hoping to complete that study and then some.

Nature notes

“How do squirrels put their leaf nests together so that they don’t fall apart?” Once leaves have fallen, squirrel nests or dreys are easy to see, often in an oak providing acorns or near a grapevine offering support. Location is important and a leafy nest can be built near a tree trunk, between limbs, in the crotch of a tree or on a strong limb at least 20 feet above ground. Built in summer or early fall, the drey begins as a collection of small, chewed-off branches bearing green leaves that are woven together. Even though they have browned by winter, the leaves continue to cling tightly to their branches because they were harvested before the tree began dropping its leaves.

The branches are loosely woven into a hollow sphere, the inner surface of which is lined with a variety of materials, including grass, leaves, moss, pine needles and shredded bark. The outer layer of leaves sheds rain and provides protection from wind while the lining insulates against cold. The entrance hole faces the tree trunk. Flat or incomplete dreys are either the remains of summer sleeping platforms or the efforts of young squirrels. Squirrels usually build a couple of dreys, allowing an option should one nest be disturbed by a predator or infested with lice and fleas. Hollow trees are the preferred nest sites for nurseries.

Meeting adjourned

Accept kindness gratefully. Then regift it.