Al Batt: Spare parts offer future mystery
Published 9:59 am Wednesday, July 23, 2014
Echoes from the Loafers’ Club Meeting:
“We’ve been married 33 years.”
“It’s nice you’ve remembered.”
“It’s easy to remember. We got married the same year I bought the new toaster.”
Driving by the Bruces
I have two wonderful neighbors — both named Bruce — who live across the road from each other. Whenever I pass their driveways, thoughts occur to me, such as: If only I knew then what I know now but can’t remember.
The news from Hartland
Woman finds snake on porch and cautiously burns her house down.
Ferris Bueller fired from yet another job for missing too many days of work.
Pumpkin Patch repairs leaking squash.
New to these parts
I was searching for the right Allen wrench when I came across a bag of small parts. They’d been placed nicely into a plastic bag. There was no labeling or instruction booklet with them. I’m sure I put the items into the bag, but why? And what were they for? Spare parts or leftovers?
Perhaps I’d put the odd parts into the bag so that one day, I’d find the bag and wonder what the parts were for.
I keep myself entertained.
As Tony the Tiger said, ‘They’re great!’
I stopped briefly at a reunion recently. I wanted to express my appreciation to those in attendance for their good work and fine company. The reunion was for those who had worked at Tony’s, a gas station in New Richland. It was much more than a gas station, but that’s what we called them before they became convenience stores. Tony Arnfelt’s establishment offered gas, repairs, snacks, pop, air for tires, windshield cleaning, advice, and wisdom. It was shelter in a storm and gave life depth. Tony hired good people and I’m glad that Tony’s was a part of my life, even if my role was merely that of a loiterer.
It was a great idea for a reunion. I think a school bus reunion would be a good idea, too. Many of us rode with a flock of folks over the years.
A peregrination
I turned off Interstate 94 and visited New Salem, N.D. to see Salem Sue, the world’s largest Holstein. The fiberglass cow is 38 feet high and 50 feet long.
Another turn off I-94 brought me to Jamestown’s Dakota Thunder, the world’s largest buffalo monument 26 feet tall, 46 feet long, and weighing 60 tons. The sculptor’s name was Elmer Peterson. A name meant for the job.
Near Devils Lake, I stopped at Sullys Hill National Game Preserve. Sullys Hill is one of 560 refuges in the National Wildlife Refuge System managed by the U.S. Fish & Wildlife Service specifically for wildlife. Sullys Hill is named for Gen. Alfred Sully. President Theodore Roosevelt established Sullys Hill as a national park in 1904. In 1914, it was designated as a preserve to conserve bison and elk.
A monument claimed Rugby was the geographical center of North America. There is some argument about that assertion, but while I was there, it seemed to be true.
Work took me to the Netherlands. I arrived late at a hotel. I didn’t have the time to get much sleep. The next morning, as I waited for a ride to the Amsterdam airport, I found myself in a Holland daze.
A goof goes grocery shopping
I was doing the best I could. I moved about the supermarket in fits and starts. I’d had a piece of paper itemizing the groceries I needed to buy. It refused to present itself. Lost, I suppose. I wandered listlessly about the store.
Did you know?
Folklore says that equestrian statues contain codes whereby the rider’s fate could be determined by how many hooves the horse has raised. One hoof raised, the rider was wounded in battle; two raised hooves, death in battle; all four hooves on the ground, the rider survived all battles unharmed. This isn’t true.
A Bureau of Labor Statistics survey showed the average American sleeps 8 hours and 45 minutes daily.
People once blamed bad dreams on the night-hag. This demon caused nightmares by inducing feelings of suffocation. Strategies for keeping the night-hag at bay included putting bread blessed by clergy under a pillow or hanging flint chips (hag-stones) on the bedposts.