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“Seek the Lord and his strength, seek his presence continually!” — I Chronicles 16:11

One of my good friends stopped by to visit the other day.  She asked how I was doing, and I said, “fine.”  “How can you always be fine?” she asked jokingly.  “I have moments when I cry,” I said.  “Just yesterday I cried when I was sitting outside, and I couldn’t see the birds because I was not able to turn my wheelchair towards them.  One of my family members helped me, but I get so frustrated,” I said.

I could have told her about the sadness that overcomes me when I think of all of the things I used to be able to do before ALS.

I could have told her about the countless nights I lie awake pondering what I can do without the use of my hands or the ability to walk?

I could have told her how I often wonder how I can be happy in a world that glorifies the fact that we have to”get things done” in order to feel whole.

But I didn’t share any of those thoughts with her.  Instead I shared that in my darkest moments, I ask God for his presence to be with me.  I added that my life has been completely turned upside down over the past five years and yet, I have this unstoppable inner strength.  I can only attribute it to the spiritual presence of God.

Lord in my darkest moments, help me always remember that you are with me.